The ABCs of Revenge Hot (Right In Time For Valentine's Day)
By Sola Onitiri
Revenge hot (adjective): An aesthetic look that slays so hard that it incurs feelings of wrath, jealousy, and/or regret in a person that may (or may not) have caused you emotional harm.
No matter what you have planned for the blessed *cough* dreaded day of Valentine's Day, there’s one thing you just need to do and that’s prepare to look so hot that you can not be ignored. Or, alternatively, so hot that you can forget that you are chronically single.
As said person who is chronically single AND pretty much lives in loud layers, pin stripes, and graphic Ts. Revenge hot is without a doubt out of my fashion comfort zone. But you can’t make an omelet without cracking a few eggs. So this list is going to push the envelope, and get you in touch with your groove. No matter what size you are, these types of dresses will help you serve up some ice cold fashion revenge.
'A' is For Asymmetric
I have long been a critic of many high-low styles (especially in skirts and shirts) however a good asymmetric hem is a true revenge hot power play. Instead of the high-low front asymmetric hem, go for a side asymmetric hem. It shows off a little more leg, and (depending on the way that it’s cut) accentuates both the waist and your hips. When going asymmetric, stick to solid non textured colors; let your legs do the talkin’ and walking.
Bonus 'A' Tip!
A wrap dress is the best way to rock an asymmetric look. Go for one in metallic or give it a twirl in some stripes.
'B' is For Bodycon
I can’t believe I’m saying this but - February is the time to get your Yeezy Seasons four through six on. Made famous by the Kardashian and Jenner tribe, body-con dresses and skirts are pretty much ALL you see when you go dress shopping now. For the fearless and confident, body-con dresses leave absolutely no room for meekness. So, if you are used to wearing loose fitting clothes and are a little uneasy about anything up to a skin-tight dress, here’s what I recommend: mix and match your body con. Instead of opting for the full dress, pick up a long sleeve, body-con top with a low 'V' for a little extra cleavage or match a midi body-con skirt with a loose textured formal crop top. Revenge hot is all about confidence, so wear what you feel the most comfortable and confident in.
Bonus B Tip!
Go backless! Nothing is sexier or more daring than a come hither backless dress.
'C' is for Cut Outs
Your outfit should be so sharp it could cut - so why not give cut outs a try. Cut outs come in all different shapes and sizes, and the key to success is finding the ones that accentuates your favorite features. Feeling like your waist needs a little attention go for a dress that has two cutouts on the side. Got Michelle Obama arms, find cut outs that expose your shoulders and arms. Have you been hitting the gym to obtain Britney Spears circa 2003 abs? Then go for the barely there mid stomach cutout.
Bonus C Tip - Contrasting Colors
Instead of going with the traditional LBD, consider a dress with contrasting colors that help give your body some extra shape. Wearing dark colors that run along the sides of a dress creates an optical illusion that gives you a great slimming shape.
So how do you know you’ve reached peak Revenge Hot?
Well, here are a few symptoms you might feel when you've got the perfect dress. 1. You feel the need to update your Tinder profile. 2. The whole squad approves of your outfit. 3. You receive some thirsty Snapchat's from an ex. 4. You get a hey what’s up text from that person you went on a blind date with once. 5. You look and feel like you’re finally ready to Instagram famous.
If you don't feel like walking around taking selfies, then keep looking! Next question. Where do you wear this impossibly spicy dress to. The possibilities are endless. I'm talking Galentine's Day Happy Hour or the singles Saturday after Valentine's Day.